Father's Day

Have I said before that I am blessed beyond measure? I am. I have one of the best Daddy's ever. He is a good man with a loving heart. He is quiet, yet strong. He is hard working. He makes me proud just being himself.

My Dad has always been a truck driver. When I was growing up, that meant he was gone much of the time. I have heard my Dad on several occasions, when told he has great children, give the credit to my Mom. She worked and held it together while he was working away from home. It speaks of his character that he deflects that praise to her. He is very quiet and when he does talk, often it is with his seriously dry humor and will crack you up! He works hard to this day, and it is evident when you visit the family farm. He is proud of his family and it's history. He is generous and kind. If he had a motto, I believe it would be "Do it right and keep it simple". No, he isn't perfect, but I would not trade him for anything.

This morning I have been thinking about the Father's in my life.....

My husband, Troy. The father of my two children, Trina and Ty. He is a great Dad. He has always worked so hard to give them everything. He loves them, supports them in every way. He is there for them and he makes me happy that he is their Dad. It touches my heart to see him with them. And now, he is a PawPaw for Kambyr. I think he found his calling with her. She loves many people, but I have sneaking suspicion that he is at the top of her list! He has earned a special place in the hearts of his children, granddaughter and countless other kids who have been a part of our lives. He earned it by being there. Being supportive and showing them love. I dare say there has never been a time that his love was in doubt. I am grateful for him.

My son-in-law, Joe. Joe makes me tear up. It is an overwhelming feeling when your grandbabies are born. That "my heart is gonna burst" kind of love. I know my daughter and her daughter are in good hands. When I see Joe with Kambyr, I know I have been blessed. Joe gives me peace of mind. He is something else. Kambyr had her first dance recital in May. He went up on stage and gave her flowers. I literally lost it. I couldn't have chosen a better man. I am grateful and proud and I love him more than he knows.

My brother, Robbie. He is much like my father. Hard working, quiet and loves his family. Robbie has always been a little "stern". (LOL for those who really know him!) Not that being stern is a bad thing. But, I have to say, it has been nice to see him mellow a bit in the past couple of years. He has a great son, Ryan and he is a great father. He always wants what is best for Ryan and has always done everything he could for him. It's really good to see them together. Ryan won't admit it, but he is much like his father. And that is a good thing. I love you Robbie and I am proud of you too.

My brother-in-law, Robert. I was 18 when Jennifer was born. He has always been such a great dad. He was different from what I had known of father's growing up. He was part of the generation of men who began taking a more active role in the day to day responsibilities of parenting. No criticism of the previous generation, it was just a different time. When I was at OSU, I wrote a paper on the changing role of a father. He is the father I wrote about. He was so involved with Jennifer and Dustin and now he is the same with his Grandbabies. I love you Bobby. It is a joy to see you with the kids. Nieces and nephews too. They know he loves them. What more could you ask for?

My nephew, Dustin. He defnitely took after his Daddy.He works hard, he is involved and he adores his children. He is expecting his third child any day now. They are having a son, Conner Wayne. I love you Dustin. I love how you have embraced being a Dad and it shows in your children.

My nephew, Scott. Again, he is awesome. He works and works and works. His family is his priority and he takes care of them. He makes me smile, watching him with his kids. I love you too, Scott. Jenny did allright!

The late Johnnie Thompson. He was a man, way ahead of his time. You know they say it takes a village to raise a child. This man helped raise many of us in the "village" of Stroud, Oklahoma. I miss him dearly and I have great memories of him. He told it like it was, he loved us, he helped us, he supported us, he laughed with us and at us, he was a father to us, to me. He tried to guide us, but didn't judge us. I can see him now. Sitting at the counter. Legs crossed with a cup of coffee and a cigarette, shaking his head with that humongous grin. I loved him dearly and he raised a couple of awesome kiddos, Amber and Raphe. Thanks for everything Johnnie.

I just felt the need to let these men and their families know how special they are to me. I have been blessed. I am grateful. Happy Father's Day.

Life is hard, but life is good. Much love.

"I Just Need Company For A Minute..."

I work in Downtown Tulsa. There is a spot where I go to smoke (I know, I shouldn't). There are these concrete barriers and I usually lean/sit against one and play on my phone. I see lots of homeless people. Most go on about their business, some will panhandle or ask for a cigarette. Usually though, they just go on about their way.

One day I was out there and not paying attention. I hear a man's voice say "Do you mind if I sit down?" I look up and tell him have a seat. I have been asked this before, by homeless people, even if they are just sitting somewhere nearby. This homeless man sits down right beside me! I mean RIGHT beside me. Close enough our arms are touching. My mind is racing. Do I get up, do I stay put? What do I do?

Then this man says, "I hope you don't mind my sitting here. I just need some company for a minute." Of course, now I cannot leave. I didn't sense a threat. It was a bit awkward, but not scary. After a minute or two he asks how my day is going. I tell him fine and ask about his day. He says the same. Still we both just sit there. I don't remember all he said, but just idle chit chat now and again. I am playing a game on my iphone and this man is just sitting there. Then he says "I think I am going to take a nap now." I said "ok". He got up and took just a couple of steps. Laid his backpack down for a pillow and lays down under the tree right there. He closed his eyes and went to sleep. I sat there for another minute or so and then I got up and went back to work.

All the time this is going on, my mind is spinning. What is he doing? What does he want? Well, he told me what he wanted. He just wanted company for a minute. He asked me for NOTHING more than my company for a minute. I do not think I am special. I don't know what this was about. But, as I walked away, I thought about the song "What if God was one of us?". I have never seen that man before and I haven't seen him since. We do recognize the homeless that are frequent in that part of downtown. I am not saying it was God. I am saying, I don't know. Maybe God put me in that place to share a moment with someone who needed to not be alone. Maybe it was a test.

I know as I have thought about this many times since it happened, I am glad I was there. I am glad I didn't jump up and move. So many homeless people do suffer from mental illness and alcoholism. But, besides their weaknesses they are people with hearts and feelings and sometimes just need "company for a minute".

Wow. Life is hard, but life is good. Much love.

Do you want to be right? Or do you want to be with Ty?

Last May I was involved in a situation that caused me a great deal of distress. This post is not about going over the situation again. It is about emotions, adrenaline, being both right and wrong and the price to be paid.

The scenario played out and I was extremely upset, probably fair to say out of control angry. I was asked to leave the final Senior Year function because I did not have a t-shirt. When I refused to leave the Sheriff was summoned. This is a huge “cut to the chase” of the story, especially for me! By this time I was angry, overwhelmed with emotion and crying. I was out by my car and I called (at midnight) Broadway Baptist Senior Pastor Mark Miller. Bless his heart, he talked to me. The truth is, several parents did offer me their shirts. If I would wait a while, etc. when they left they would give me theirs so I could stay. My answer was an emphatic NO. It was the principle of the thing and I believed with all of my heart I was right. I did not need a shirt, I was a mother who had a right to be there with her child and I was absolutely not backing down. So, while I am carrying on talking to Mark, he raised his voice and he said words I will never, ever forget. “Do you want to be right? Or do you want to be with Ty?” He stopped me in my tracks. Truthfully I wanted both. I believed I was right and I believed I had a right to be with Ty. Mark made me think though, and I was actually ready to back down and take someone’s shirt so I could be there with my son. Mark was right and I was wrong. By this time it was too late to change my mind. The Sheriff was waiting for this criminal mom to leave the premises. And I did. My inability to accept the kind gesture of another, because I was right, cost me any chance I might have had to stay and enjoy this time with my son.

Many times since that night, I have heard those words again in my mind. “Do you want to be right? Or do you want to be with Ty?” I guess I am asking those reading this to ask yourselves that question. Do you want to be right at all costs? Does the end justify the means? Is the price you are going to pay worth what you are going to miss? I say it is not worth it.

I know people, we all know someone, who has a broken relationship because they are right and the other person is wrong. Often this is the feeling on both sides of the battle. The result is a loss of relationship. A loss of time, something we cannot get back. There will never be another Senior Celebration for Ty. That is over. Just as there with never be another “fill in the blank” for you. Do me a favor and think about it. Decide if that for which you are making a stand is worth what you are losing. Think about “Do you want to be right? Or do you want to be with ….?” The simplicity of the statement is very powerful if you will just think about it.

Another reference, a few years ago I had a situation with a family member that blew up. I did not intend for it to happen but it did. This went on for six months or better. Family talking to me, family talking to them…but nothing changed. It was heartbreaking. I cried a great deal because I valued the relationship and loved the person. It hurt others around us because they wanted things to be right again and they were not and there was no end in sight. I skipped a family function because I could not deal with it. This was painful for my mother. I did not want to hurt her, but I was not going to change it. The next family function came around and I went. This family member and I came face to face. I love you’s were exchanged and a big hug and I cried, again. We did not talk about it. I do not believe it was necessary. The time lost was enough and the decision was made in that moment that we did not need to talk about it. There was no value to going through it again. The point is that the love was stronger than the battle. An unspoken agreement to put it to rest was made and kept. The price of keeping the battle raging was just too high.

I ask you today, do you have a relationship that needs mended? Are you losing time with someone you love? These battles hurt far more than those engaged. It hurts everyone you surround yourself with and love. My heart aches for some that I know who have family issues that spill over to the rest of the family. You do not have to feel like you have lost if you give in. You do not have to go back through the original issue. You just have to love and want more than anything to be together. You have to ask yourself, “DO YOU WANT TO BE RIGHT? OR DO YOU WANT TO BE WITH TY?”

Life is hard, but life is good. Much love.

Best Wishes to Mack Brown, One of My All Time Favorite Coaches...

I LOVE football. Always have. Even as a young girl I was a die hard OSU fan, Longhorns fan and NOT a fan of anything OU. That is my choice and I am entitled to it. I don't even know why I feel that way, but I always have.

I just read a news story that gave a quote from Mack Brown. To paraphrase, he said he was brought in to unite the program and make it stronger. That was accomplished, but now the program is being pulled in different directions again. Time for someone else to come in and take over. In my opinion, that doesn't make him a bad coach, it makes him a good person. Nobody wants to be fired. He sees and hears what is being said. And he is going to walk away with his head held high. That is first class.

I had the opportunity to meet Mack Brown in 2008. Had a personal conversation, just me, Ty, Troy and Coach Brown. We took Ty to the Mack Brown Football Camp and Coach had just taken INDIVIDUAL pics with 718 7th and 8th grade boys. We were one of the very last due to a lost physical. Coach Brown didn't rush us. He talked with Ty about football. He was friendly and kind. I was impressed. The camp was great. I sent a thank you note to Coach Brown, thanking him and his staff for a great experience for my son. Coach Brown actually responded to my note with a personal, hand written note of his own. Thanking me for trusting them with my son and of course to invite us back.

It is safe to say that as a fan of Coach Brown I was thrilled. He is a good man who had headed up a great program. I am sad to see him go, but I do believe that he is doing the best thing for the team. Of course, it is best for him as well. I am not blind or crazy, it is to his benefit to resign. But, he is not leaving in shame of scandal, he is leaving because it is time. Good for you Coach Brown. Thanks for the memories and I personally wish you all the best life has to offer.Hook 'em Horns!

He's Mine!

When my son was little, like 3 years old, he would say things like "Oh, you gave me a fright!". He often used words well beyond his years. And he used them in the appropriate context. We knew he was bright. We were fortunate for him to be able to attend Broadway Baptist for Kindergarten. Lisa Wooten was his teacher and Joella was the assistant. There were only 13 children in the class. I am proud to say each student from that class has done exceptionally well throughout their schooling in Sand Springs. The blessings kept on coming in Elementary with Mrs. Deb Lee for 1st Grade, Mrs. Conley for 2nd, Mrs. Kayre Pryor 3rd, Mrs. Talesa Hilton 4th and Mrs. Shannon Bussey Davis for 5th. In Jr. High and High School, Ty has also had outstanding teachers. They are dedicated and genuinely care about their students.

 

Ty has been a sports freak since he was very young. He would throw stats at us about players we never heard of. He loved Shaq and would get so mad at me when I would say I wished that man could make a free throw! He loved all things sports. He also loved to play. He began playing football and basketball in Kindergarten. Because of the way the birthday falls, he changed football teams several times before starting tackle in 3rd grade. He was coached first by Britt Reeder, later by Jeremy Tolbert and Kieth Hilligoss and by Darran Harger and Bryan Benton thru the tackle years. Dad traveled a lot, but Dad was always an assistant and was there as often as possible. Basketball was different. His first and last league coach was Tom Askew. Tom coached Ty for 8 years. They broke the mold with Tom. Thanks to all who spent uncountable hours with the boys. It is not an easy job.

 

Ty has excelled in school, tested off the charts and made top grades. I can only recall one time getting a call from a teacher saying that he was misbehaving in class. This teacher actually called me to tell me that Ty had been warned. He laughed in her class. I let her know I would certainly be talking about the situation with him. I won't say the name, but this teacher didn't like anyone. Enough said, it was sort of funny. After about the 8th grade, Ty started making choices that drove us crazy. If he was given an assignment that he thought was a waste of time, he didn't do it. This went on even through high school. I talked to teachers, counselors and the principal. I threatened and cried and yelled at Ty. Every time this would come up again, I would talk about scholarship dollars flying out the window. Troy and I knew he had the ability to do anything he chose to do. We know it even now. Some of his choices did come back to bite him in the hiney. But, they were his choices and now he has to live with them.

 

Ty has always been a passionate athlete. He is not an aggressive person as a rule. When he steps onto the field or the court, he totally morphs. He wants his team to win. We have loved watching him play. For me, football was the big one. He has always loved both football and basketball. Ty isn't the "stand out" who always has his name or picture in the paper. Ty has always been at the heart of the team. Solid, consistent and knows the game inside and out. Never missing a workout or practice and giving 110% always. When Troy had his stroke, it was in September. Ty did miss a couple of days of school being at the hospital. He did not miss practice. He went to practice and back to the hospital. Ty's Jr year he was seroiusly injured in the 5th week of the season. A JV game at Union. The injury required surgery to put everything back as it should be and put him out of sports for 6 months. That included basketball season. Yet, as was mentioned at the basketball banquet this year, he never missed a practice or game. He wasn't able to play or workout, but he went to everything the rest of the team did.  This year, 2012-2013, Ty's senior year, the football team had a great season. Ty played left tackle and deep snapper. He doesn't care where he plays. He just wants to play. He desperately wanted to end his Senior Year with a win over Sapulpa. They got it. They made it to the playoffs, losing in the first round to Broken Arrow. It was a great game. They never gave up. It was a heartbreaker and many tears were shed by players, parents and fans. They lost to a good team. Part of the heartache and tears were due to it being the "end". The end of high school football. This Momma grieved the end of it all. I can tell you that for certain. This years team was a TEAM. I am very proud of each and every one of the boys, trainers and coaches. Basketball had a tough season, but again, the boys never gave up. I am proud of that group of boys and coaches as well.

 

The time came to begin to apply for college. Ty has said since he was very young he was going to go "away" to college and never come back. (LOL) We have learned that the "plan" for Ty was not to go away. Ty scored very well on the ACT. He took the test several times and the result remarkably was always the same. Each section varied, but the composite the same. Ty used the Common Ap for most of his choices. On a sort of a whim, he applied to the University of Tulsa. Truthfully, he had no intention of going to TU. He got mail from more than 80 colleges and universities. He would go through the mail and glance at it and set it aside. He got a packet from TU and didn't even open it. A few days later, Troy did. It was an acceptance letter. Every couple of days he got mail, emails or a phone call from TU. Have you made a decision? What can we do to help with your decision? And another letter came with a scholarship offer. We have since learned their scholarship offer was just under the max they offer other than a Presidential Scholarship. The more info they sent, he more interested he became. TU actually made Ty feel like they wanted him and he was liking what he was seeing about the university. US News ranks TU 83rd in the nation. 77% of their Chemistry major grads go on to a Master's or higher. Class sizes are very small. Private colleges are very expensive. The scholarship was important. We make too much money to qualify for grants, but not even close to enough to simply write a check!

 

At one point this year, I was very frustrated with Ty. I sent an email venting those frustrations to the HS Counselor, Stacy Duncan. Ms. Duncan has been working with our family since Sophomore year and knows Ty very well. She responded to my email with encouraging words. Not a quote, but something like this...... "I believe God has a plan for Ty. I believe Ty will end up exactly where he is supposed to be and it will all work out. I truly believe this." Ty applied to quite a few colleges. All of them top, private colleges. Colleges that are very selective and highly competitive for admission. As it turns out, TU was the only school he was accepted to. Honestly, it was disappointing to receive the "regret" letters. The good news was, the whole time Ty knew he not only had been accepted by TU, but he had also been offered a scholarship to attend. And it was flattering that they were still actively pursuing him, wanting him to attend their school. So, the decision was made to accept the offer from TU. Troy, Ty and I attended TU Preview Day on Friday, April 19th. It was a very good day.

 

Ty spoke with his HS Head Coach, Dustin Kinard about walking on at TU as a deep/long snapper. A position that Ty has always been very good at. He isn't a small person, but he is not big enough to play on the line in college football. While we were on campus we decided to go by the football offices and find out details of the "walk on" process at TU. Ty actually had the opportunity to meet Head Coach Bill Blankenship. He happened to be in the reception area. He introduced himself to Ty and was very kind and helpful. He asked reception to find Special Teams Coach Downing or Coach Clint Roundtree to speak with us. We met Coach Downing briefly and sat down for a talk with Coach Roundtree. Ty is now going to be a walk on at the University of Tulsa.

 

Many other things happened on this day, we spoke with the Financial Aid Office, The Office of Admissions, we have to get an appointment soon for Ty to enroll for the Fall and also for one class in summer school. Ty has to be an enrolled student to be able to work out at the university. NCAA rules. We still had questions about financial details and such. It was overwhelming. Ty was going to have an opportunity to make his dreams come true. As his parents, were we going to be able to work out our part? We had a break before our appointment with the Admissions Counselor. Troy and I were stressing out and I remembered what Ms. Duncan said. "I believe God has a plan for Ty". I mentioned this to Troy and Ty and told them to hang in there. I believe this is God's plan as well. TU is a great school, they are selective too and they want him to attend! The meeting went better than expected. Ty will be allowed to live at home this year. That alone will be a savings of approximately $10K. Everything fell into place. Ty will be able to attend TU and Ty will be given an opportunity to walk on the football team. All of the scholarships are renewable. Being a part of the football team, even as a walk on, he will be required to have study time, etc. This will help him keep the grades he needs to maintain the scholarships. The other side is, being on scholarship will allow him to be a walk on and the coaching staff was pretty darned excited about his ACT and the academic scholarship. A win/win. Thank you Ms. Duncan for your faith in God and your faith in our son. You helped us in a way you didn't even know. God is good and he has made a way for our son to work toward his goals and make his dreams come true. Now it is time for him to do his part. Troy, Trina and I do have faith in God and faith in Ty as well. We believe and we believe he can and will do this.

CPHS Senior Celebration

This Senior Celebration situation with the Case Community Center is a problem. When I wrote my letter to the editor of the Sand Springs Leader, I was personally phoned by Paul Waldschmidt. We discussed my comments and I confirmed they were in fact my words. Secondly, I spoke face to face with Mr. Gerondale and Mr. Edwards. I spoke with them after the basketball homecoming pep assembly, at Ron’s Hamburger’s. I believe the date was 01/25/13.

I do not know the exact figures of the fees charged in previous years. I assume that as a committee member, Mr. Cook’s numbers are correct. I applaud the parents of the Class of 2014 for being pro-active for next year’s event. I know that it takes many, many hours and a good amount of money for this event. I am not a member of the 2013 Committee. I am however, a parent of a Senior of the Class of 2013. I cannot speak for the committee. I can say that the parents of this class have always been very involved and I have every confidence in them. I also believe it would be fair to assume the fees for our class would be the same as the fees charged in previous years.

I first became aware of the fee issue from another senior parent. The parent stated that the fee had increased significantly ($1,200). This parent also stated they had spoken with our City Manager, Rocky Rogers, regarding the fee. The parent said Mr. Rogers’ response was to say that the Case Center is a business and expected to produce revenue. My understanding is that was the end of the conversation. I do not know Mr. Rogers. I don’t know if he actually lives in Sand Springs or if he has children in our district. I would be interested to know those things. I do know Mr. Gerondale and Mr. Edwards. I do know that Mr. Gerondale’s children graduated from CPHS and that Mr. Edwards has children in our school system.

 

I posted a “rant” on Facebook after speaking with that parent and hearing the comments from Mr. Rogers. I wrote my letter to the editor of the Leader at the same time. Shortly after, before the letter was printed, I ran into Mr. Gerondale and Mr. Edwards at Ron’s. I sat down at their table to talk to them about it. I then posted again on Facebook and corrected some of my comments based on that conversation. Now, after reading the article in this week’s Leader, I am left shaking my head.

 

When I sat down with Mr. Gerondale and Mr. Edwards the conversation was not at first what I expected. Mr. Gerondale was very defensive and was not happy that I was “confronting” them about it. I didn’t share that before because I didn’t believe it was relevant. This has just become crazy and I am going to share the conversation.

 

Mr. Gerondale did tell me at that time that he had not been contacted directly by any 2013 Committee members. It seemed to be a problem. He said City Council members had been contacted as well as the City Manager. He stated he was tired of getting phone calls and emails from the City Manager about it, when he hadn’t been contacted himself. I understand that. He is the Director of the Parks Department and that includes the Case Center. I told Mr. Gerondale that I am not a committee member, but that I was there, in person, speaking to him about the situation. I wasn’t there to argue or be ugly. I was asking questions so that I could understand and know for myself why the cost had increased.

Mr. Gerondale, with some input from Mr. Edwards, stated the following as I remember it:

·         The Case Center is self-funded. All repairs and upgrades, etc. are accomplished with funds generated by the facility. All funds generated stay with the facility. They do not go into the City budget. If they do not charge for use of the facility, they will not be able to maintain the facility. That is business and that is understandable.

·         The reason for the cost increase was the number of hours used. In the past the event was only charged the hourly rate until midnight. The event would now be charged for every hour the facility was being used. Just like any other group requesting the facility would be charged.

·         A certified letter was sent to the head of the committee for the Class of 2010 advising them of this change and requesting that the information be forwarded to future committees so there would be no misunderstanding.

·         Each year the staff of the Case Center would spend hours the morning after the event cleaning the facility and taking out all of the trash. Getting the facility back in order. Stating specifically that the facility was not left in the same condition it was before the event.

·         Just because the Senior Celebration is not for profit did not mean the event should be charged less than any other group. Many groups such as the Rotary, etc. are not for profit and it wouldn’t be right to treat Senior Celebration differently. If our group received a special deal others should expect the same.

·         City Councilor Rankin had commented to a parent that the kids could come work at the Case Center and earn hours for the event. Mr. Gerondale confirmed that is possible and that same information is on their website.

In the news article Mr. Waldschmidt said Mr. Gerondale “suggested in the past years less hours were scheduled”.  That is not the case. According to what Mr. Gerondale said and referenced above is that less hours were billed. I believe that is what Mr. Gerondale was suggesting. Mr. Waldschmidt just didn’t know.

The suggestion by Councilor Rankin that the kids volunteer at the center to earn “free” hours for the event is, in my opinion, something to consider. The NHS and I am sure other groups require the students perform a minimum number of community service hours. Why not allow students from any grade volunteer and designate those hours to Senior Celebration? If it becomes a tradition to do this, and sophomores and juniors are donating their hours too, in the following years those other classes will benefit from the incoming classes. Yes, our children work hard in class to graduate. But, again, if they are going to be performing community service anyway, why not volunteer to this and help in two ways?

Councilor Rankin also suggested that a flat fee be set for the event. That sounds like a good idea. We all know that there are costs involved for the facility to be in use. I don’t believe that any Senior Celebration committees from any year wish for the facility to fail to cover their costs to be open for the event. The committees and the parents work diligently all year long to raise funds and generate all things needed for a successful event. Many hours are donated and many dollars are solicited and donated. The goal of the parents is to have a safe, drug free, alcohol free place for our children to go and celebrate their accomplishments. For many of the students, this will be the last time they are together with their friends. It is a huge deal in so many ways.

I strongly disagree that Senior Celebration should be treated the same as other non-profit groups. This is for our children! This is something they will always remember and is a gift to them. I seriously doubt any other non-profit groups in town would object to making this affordable. Many of those groups offer scholarships and awards, etc. to the Seniors. They support our kids. They want our kids to be happy and safe and to have good memories of growing up in Sand Springs.

I also strongly disagree with City Manager, Mr. Rogers that this doesn’t have to be decided right now. I encourage the parents of the Class of 2014 continue to push the issue now. Lobby not only for the Class of 2014, but for the future classes as well. Why not decide this right now? This is a non-issue for the Class of 2013. Our event will be held at Chandler Park. Our deal is done. Please look ahead to the coming classes and get something set up so the fees for using our hometown facility can be budgeted and known. Consider working with the school and allowing students to work community service at the center and donate those hours to this event. People, it takes a village. Be a part of the village and a part of the solution. Help these parents do something special for their children.

I want to say for myself that none of this is personal. I do know Mr. Gerondale. I know that he is a good man and has been very involved with the schools and activities when his children were a part of our system. I don’t believe that he is against Senior Celebration. I believe he is doing his job. I say the same of Mr. Edwards. We should listen to them. If we are going to ask for a break on the cost, we need to be confident we are not adding any costs for the center.

I respect both Mr. Gerondale and Mr. Edwards. I know they are not against “us”. They are trying to be responsible for their facility. Mr. Rankin seems to be interested in working with Senior Celebration in at least making the fee a set fee and that is helpful. The parents are trying to keep their children safe. We are all part of the same community. Work it out. Keep our kids close to home. Work it out so any funds that are spent on a facility are kept in our City from now on. It can be a win-win if we make it one.

Ch...Ch...Ch...Changes!

Every so often on Facebook, I see a post that goes something like this: I am tired of seeing people post how bad their life is or how badly they are treated, etc. If you don't like your life and the way it is going...change it. The post states that those people are looking for someone to tell them they are good, or they are worthy and to quit depending on others for that confirmation. Wow. Really? I am glad you have all of the answers. Maybe you should share those answers so that the rest of the world can know how to get through the day every day.

Sometimes we do have pity parties. Sometimes we do need to have someone who cares about us tell us to stop the pity party. Sometimes people do want to hear that they are okay and worthy. Sometimes people need to hear that. Sometimes we do need to make changes. But, make no mistake, changes are not easy. They are difficult, they are scary and seem like they are impossible.

I am a social worker. Five days a week, 8 hours a day, I see people who need to make changes. People don't come to my work because life is good. They come because life is hard. Some come after a devastating change in their life. Others because it is a way of life and they have grown accustomed to sitting back and letting others do for them. Still others just need help for a short time while they get it together. But, again, none of them come there because life is rosy.

I have been called a "bleeding heart". That is okay with me. I have been called worse by people who meant it. Why not tell that person who is "whining" that you will pray for them and do it? You don't have to tell them they are good or pretty or smart or whatever. Maybe what they need to know is that they are not alone. Don't underestimate the power of your words and gestures. You don't have to be drawn into the drama, you can simply let them know someone cares. You might be the one to make a difference and never know that you did. One thing is for sure, if you say or do nothing you won't have to wonder about that.

We all deal with life's issues differently. That is because each life is different and each set of circumstances are different. In the song "Jesus Loves Me" is the phrase "we are weak but HE is strong". Think about that.

Let me tell you a bit about me. I am loud. My mother always said "Sister, you have to remember your voice carries." That was her way of saying I am loud. I am strong and I advocate for what I believe in. I am a bleeding heart. I love my family and would battle anything or anyone for them. I cheer for the underdog. I laugh at stupid things and cry easily. I often speak without thinking but rarely intend to be hurtful. (Never wouldn't be true sadly.) I love animals. I love it when a kid gives me a hug. I sometimes hide chocolate so Ty won't eat it all. I have been with my husband for 25 years. I have a beautiful daughter. She has given me a precious gift of a beautiful granddaughter. I have a son who makes me proud and frustrates the hell out of me at the same time. I am blessed with a sister, a brother, my mom and dad, nieces and nephews...I have also been given the gift of having a mother/child relationship with many other young people. What more could anyone ask for, right?

Let me tell you a few other things about me. I am intimidated by all of the ch...ch...ch...changes in life. The changes that have already occured and those that may occur. I rarely speak, actually talk to, anyone on a daily basis that doesn't work with me or live in my home. I speak with my mother often, she is the exception. If I don't talk to her, she will keep calling. (LOL) Everything I do outside of my home focuses on someone else. I have a dog I have had for 13 years that has become nearly blind and deaf and breaks my heart. I don't always do the things I should be doing around the house. I procrastinate like crazy. I am late to work nearly every day. I don't sleep well. I waste time doing things that aren't important instead of doing the things that need to be done. I don't make time for people that I should and I am sure I am missing out on things because of that. Things that would bring me joy. I am terrified at the thought of my son graduating in May and leaving home. I know it is going to happen and truthfully want him to go and do and see. But, it still scares me. I give the impression of being a tough old broad when I am really not. I am often sad and wonder what is coming next.

This is not a pity party. I am not asking for anything. I don't want, "it will be ok" or "you are whatever". What I want is for people to open their hearts to each other. Even if you don't tell another you are praying for them, do it. They will still get the benefit of your caring and your prayers. Don't tell someone you love or care about to "suck it up and do something about it" when you are not in their position. I guess what I am saying is this: until you have walked in my shoes, don't judge me. And I am saying that for myself and anyone else it needs to be said for. If you have the opportunity to say suck it up, chances are someone has reached out to you. You may be the only one they felt they could reach out to and you may have just shot down the last hope someone had.

We all struggle at times. Remember that. Life is hard, but life is good. Much love.